I used to be a person who loved a good RomCom cry, or at least a socially appropriate cry. Today was the first time in a long time, and it was just because of the words in a song. 

“When peace like a river, attendeth my way, when sorrows like sea billows roar;

Whatever my lot, thou hath taught me to know, it is well with my soul.” 

The first chord rang and I knew it was coming, it built to the reframe and I had full blown snot and eyes swollen pink from the alligator tears flowing in the middle of church. The sky not the grave is our goal. It just becomes real when you go through something so deep and a loss that challenges what you thought were truths. 

The story of this song is of total tragedy. Horatio Spafford had moved his whole family to the U.S. and he lost his son at age 2 in the Chicago Fire of 1871. He also lost his business and his family was financially ruined. By 1873 the family decided to refute Europe, but at the last minute he decided to stay back and finish some work in Chicago before joining them. The boat the rest of his family was on collided with another ship and the only survivor was his wife. She sent him a telegram saying “Saved Alone, what shall I do.”

Shortly afterwards he sailed to Europe to meet her. The captain took him to the bow as they passed the water where his families ship sank and his children lay. Afterwards he felt so inspired he wrote ‘It is well.’

There is so much we can’t begin to comprehend. Although this is tragedy, I know God is there in the broken pieces. I think back to the peace in the room as Logan was baptized and prayed and sung to. There was no more of the Holy Spirit than what he felt in his short life. 

I will always and forever be  blubbering baby when I hear certain songs. So if you happen to be sitting next to me when they come on, please pray you have a tissue! 

Published by Beyondthewillows

I'm a wife, mother to two incredible children. One on Earth and one in heaven.

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