The Small Moments
I sometimes forget how Allie is only 5. She sometimes has crazy amounts of wisdom to say this amazing stuff! Today it was just her…
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Another Countdown from another year without you
The nights feel short in anticipation of the countdown coming. Bells will ring and celebrations that another new start is coming with the new year. For just a moment I’m pausing for my year of remembrance. My time to think about being further from your time on Earth.
Hard Part of Being Thankful
Missing someone isn't about how long it's been since you've seen them or the amount of time since you've talked. It's about that moment you were doing something wishing they were there too.
God is in the Details
About 6 months after Logan died I met another loss mama a couple years further in her journey. She told me to keep looking for…
Rush of October
October always hits hard. It’s a month for me that is a rush of doing all the fall activities and plan a birthday party right…
Capture Your Grief
Over the last 2 years I've known October as Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month. This year the milestone of this month came in like…
Witness to Hope
Today I’m so thankful for this little head that let’s me give it both kisses and tears. To soak up all of that new baby…
God Is Gracious
Not every rainbow is an ending of something. Sometimes it's just the beginning.
Looking Forward and Turning A New Page
“Whenever and however you intend to give birth, your experience will impact your emotions, your mind, your body and your spirt for the rest of your life.” Ina May Gaskin The moment a child is born a mother is born too. A woman whose life and identity is changed as a new person is now able to call her mom.
The Teacher Who I Don’t Know
There's never a great time of year for grief. Back to school is one I hadn't anticipated as hard as the Birthday child who never…
Meaning of a Rainbow
If you’re a part of the infant and pregnancy loss community you probably already know the term Rainbow Baby. A rainbow is a baby born…
A Birthday Lost in Neverland
2 years in heaven is as if it was a lifetime ago and yesterday at the same time. We will be remembering you and trying to celebrate you the best we can as the waves come and surround us today. If you are on Instagram and want to remember his story search for #Instabirth0726 and see his birth and life story and help us remember his short time here.
Pregnancy and Grief Collide
With this pregnancy I am all too aware that I have no guarantee this will turn out any differently than our last two. Knowing that I am absolutely not in control over any part of each day of this pregnancy. Being all too aware of this lack of control gives me moments of anxiety, joy, excitement, confusion and grief. It's so hard to explain to someone who hasn't gone through a pregnancy loss and understood these emotions. It's really reassuring to have a loss community of friends who remind me I'm not actually crazy, I'm just pregnant and grieving and they have to co-exist.
The Difference of a Year
What a difference 1 year in your life can make. I was thinking back to last year, remembering the depths of the valley. It was…
What I Want For Mother’s Day
This is my second Mother's Day without all my children by my side. Another one with family pictures this morning missing one person who is…
Grace upon grace
Please give me grace for where I am each day. Please forgive me when I flake out on plans because I just found a little sock and have now been crying on the floor for 20 minutes. Give me grace when I'm too afraid to let my living children out of my sight when you offer to babysit.
The Depth of Sibling Love
I'm continually amazed at how my 4 year old navigates this grief and death stuff better than me and most adults. Moments like National Siblings…
Learning to Stand Again
Easter and the celebration of heaven is reminding me I'm one day closer to being able to know for myself. One day these hard questions will be answered. Although we may all stray we will one day be finding our way back home. We are all dust and to dust we shall return.
Hoping For A Rainbow
There is no safe time of pregnancy to announce where loss isn’t a possibility. I know that no matter the length or outcome of this pregnancy we won’t get through it alone. It takes a village.
The Missing Boots
As the seasons change and we enter into the crisper barren brown of fall, there's something missing from it in my heart that cannot be filled.
