Today baby boy I thank you for allowing me the opportunity to share your story with a total stranger today. I always dread as the calendar gets closer to the 26th. Just another reminder that time has moved on without you here. My husband can testify I’m usually an emotional mess on the 25th of most months and end up taking a few hours in Logan’s room alone.
This month was so hectic with summer travel I didn’t even realize what day was approaching until late last night preparing for the next workday. I said a prayer and hoped I could get through another 26th without being the girl who cries at work.
My workday was hectic and filled back to back with helping people. It was approaching lunchtime and I had the the thought “I can fit 1 more in before lunch.”
The number I happened to call came to my window and said she was here to provide a statement of paternity for her sons child. As I got further in I learned that her son had passed unexpectedly in a drunk driving accident as a passenger. She talked about how amazing her grandchild was that he had never been able to meet as she was born after he passed.
We shared with each other about the grief that comes everyday when you lose a child. You look for ways to know your child’s memories aren’t forgotten. You look for new things to parent and teach about your child. There is still guilt and steps you wish you could change to have them back.
After the interview I went and cried with thankfulness that of all days I got to share about Logan on the 26th. The calls and texts on the 26th have slowed down from almost a year ago. I know most people don’t wish a living child a happy 11 month birthday. But most parents would be posting pictures of monthly accomplishments and stats so here’s Logan’s:
Siblings in heaven: 1
Siblings on Earth: 1
Making Mom realize her dream as a writer:1
Months in heaven: 11